Music MANday

Hey…yeah…I’m sorry…are we weird yet?

Awkward? Yes. Hot as F? Yup.

WBPT and I have had some time off. We are weirdly awkward and apprehensive around each other, troubled lovers adrift on different paths… alas, we must come to terms.

Without going too far into why we haven’t been around lately, it’s just been a fast moving, and especially busy month or so for the both of us, and blogging has taken a backseat to other endeavors. Since, plebs, I am in Huntsville for a while, I thought I would roll out a terribly written, smarmy, and otherwise hollow Music MANday. Good to be back.

This week, Music MANday will highlight a local artist out of Tuscaloosa via Huntsville, an old friend of mine and Neil’s, Grant Willis aka White Noise, and the only male in the world to ever be the music and the MAN in Music MANday. Grant, as a solo artist and with various groups and collaborations, has provided somewhat of a college soundtrack for many of our friends. We’ve all had a wine-soaked candlelight dinner with Del or have had our Heads Blown at some point. With that in mind, I thought we should interview him here on WBPT and let those who haven’t heard his music, well, listen to it. Ahead of his forthcoming move to Chattanooga, Grant was nice enough to sit down with me and Neil. We met, somewhere along the Georgia-Alabama border, a Hardees.

An evening to remember (or not)

Odysseus: Hi, good to see you again, slut.

WHITE NOISE: You don’t call me a slut, asshole. How have you been?

Odysseus: Wonderful, but still unemployed (rubs WHITE NOISE’s back).

WHITE NOISE: Hmm. Why does Neil have his hand in is pants?

Odysseus: Don’t mind him. Tell us about your music?

WHITE NOISE: I won’t ask why you phrased that as a question, but sure, yeah. I would describe it, simply, as crunkalicious, get your sex on, party-time music.

Odysseus: Ah yes, a lovely genre. Being out of the country I’ve missed so many of you new shows, but thanks to the magic in my computer I was able to listen online.  Where can we go to check it all out?

WHITE NOISE: You can check me out at various places actually. Check out my Sound Cloud for new tracks. Also, make sure and join my facebook fan page.

Odysseus: So tell us about Chattanooga. What are your plans, goals up there?

WHITE NOISE: Well, even though Chattanooga is normally thought of as a rock and country city, there is an upcoming electronic scene, with a big monthly party called Banger’s Ball, which I played recently. Also, The New Deal just played at 412 Market up there, and I had the opportunity to close for them. So to see a big monthly thing like that, and better known electronic groups finally making it down south, is badass. As far as goals go, I guess what I aim to do is continue to play in places like ATL, Nashville, Huntsville, Birmingham and Tuscaloosa, while maintaining a home base up in Chattanooga. It’s actually pretty close to all those places, so that helps.

Odysseus: How much do you hate Widespread?

WHITE NOISE: Hahaha, I don’t hate Widespread…No, I like them better now with Jimmy Herring, but that’s just not my thing really. Although have you ever noticed how every time anyone talks about a Panic show, it’s usually not about the music, but about how fucked up they got?

Odysseus: I agree. It seems like a lot of people go to shows in general, just to get fucked up, and the music almost takes a backseat. Widespread fans, even the hardcore ones, always seem to focus on the drugs and alcohol. But I guess we are all guilty of that at some point. Anyway, moving on, will you still play in the Tuscaloosa or Huntsville areas, or are you trying to spread it out more right away?

WHITE NOISE: Yes I will continue to play in Huntsville and Tuscaloosa, but be expecting to see more of me in more places, more often. Obviously I want to make Chattanooga a reference point for people wondering where I am at, but spreading it out is just natural really.

Odysseus: Well, we love your music. So make it happen. How have you enjoyed playing with artists such as Eliot Lipp, Pretty Lights, etc? And do you feel it helps bring you recognition?

WHITE NOISE: Yeah for sure. I mean, it’s fun to just go up there and have the crowd react the same way to you as they do to bigger acts, and its always encouraging and surprising. As far as the recognition thing goes, its kinda funny sometimes actually. I was in ATL for STS9 and some kid hollered out “White Noise!” as I was walking by the Tabernacle, and just to know that people in other towns appreciate your music is pretty cool.

Odysseus: Health Care?

WHITE NOISE: Do it.

Odysseus: Do me

WHITE NOISE: I don’t bang sluts.

Odysseus: Fair enough. What was it like playing in T-town during the National Championship run?

WHITE NOISE: Pretty amazing actually. The shows were one thing, but house parties really got crazy. This one party I did during the LSU weekend was ridiculous. I did about a 3 hour DJ set at a party my friends do called “Ole Sloppery” after the Pretty Lights show at the SAE house. Lots of debauchery, tits, and a “FUCK LSU!” chant on top of some drum and bass.

Odysseus: Roll Tide. So I hear you’re working on a proper album. What of it, and when are we gonna get our grubby hands on it?

WHITE NOISE: Yeah, I’ve been working on some tracks for this all original new album. It’s going to be a bunch of 70’s funk/soul/love music samples mixed in with orchestrated strings and stuff like that, and of course hip/hop and rap elements, samples from Gucci Mane, Nas, Lil Wayne and a bunch of others. After I get some help on the engineering side, mixing down and mastering them, then hopefully by this fall I will have about 8-9 tracks down. My plan then would be to tour to promote the album.

Grant at Banger's Ball in Chattanooga

Odysseus: So, what about tonight? (Grant played at Crossroads in Huntsville the day of the interview)

WHITE NOISE: Well I’ll be playing before Zoogma, and be on the lookout for some new tracks.

Odysseus:  That’s what I wanted to hear. Thanks for all your grace under pressure and your great firm handshake. We admire that in our musicians. This interview has been awesome, and I think that says a lot about me.

WHITE NOISE: You’re right, and you are the best interviewer since Dr. Ruth.

Odysseus: Thanks. Do you want to go get some Bellacino’s?

Huge thanks goes out to Grant for the interview and pre-interview inspiration (a subtler wink ne’er wink-ed). For all of you who haven’t experienced Grant’s music, stop being a butthole and grip his newest stuff. That’s all for today, but don’t worry I’ll be back tomorrow or Sunday with some new material and a bunch of interesting links.

Here are some more links to Grant’s stuff, and make sure and check out all his videos on his Facebook fan page.

Blow Your Head Promo:

http://vimeo.com/8904130

A little taste of Grant with Del, playing some Talking Heads:

http://vimeo.com/8411494

Grant profiled on Banger’s Ball and here

Oh…I had to throw this pic in…

Ὀδυσσεύς Bombay

Music MANday

What up my ninjas? Sorry about the late post yet again, been taking a beating this last week. The job market continues to kick your boy Neil right in the marbles on a daily basis, pair that with a lingering stomach virus and you have one pathetic summabitch. I would like to say something to our loyal readers concerning my BCS article last week. In no way do I see that scenario actually happening. It makes too much sense. Many folks close to the Big-10 were not so thrilled by my portrayal of their conference (which is terrible, I stand by that) and that they should simply take Iowa State as a 12th team. Missouri would make much more sense, as would Pittsburgh or Notre Dame as possible additions to the conference. They bring in more revenue and create a larger target market area (St. Louis, Pittsburgh, Chicago) for the Big-10. The addition of ISU is too neat, but was necessary to make the rest of my formula work. I’ll just leave this issue closed, but fully expect Colorado to leave for the Pac-10 and the Big-10 to add another team. Obviously these moves will have massive ramifications in the College Football arena, we’ll just have to wait and see what those are.

Music MANday is gonna be a little different this week, as I thought we would switch up the usual routine of reviewing albums and recommending our favorite funky tunes. This week I will simply post 4 of my favorite music videos, designed to excite your ears and your eyes in an attempt to incorporate some aesthetic pleasure to your reading/listening/viewing experience. Here we go.

Stick with this one, I love this concept:

Awesome video from my favorite band of 2008:

I just really like this video, shows you can do cool shit on a budget:

One of my favorite videos of all time:

If you haven’t been watching the Olympics then shame on you. People have been ripping these 2010 games lately but it still continues to be one of the most exciting and competitive competitions since Lillehammer in 1994. That being said, this week’s man can only be a certified badass from the Winter Olympic spectrum.

“I’m just trying to ski in a way that’s exciting for me. It’s been an awesome two weeks, I’ve gotten to party and socialize on an Olympic level.” No this isn’t your fraternity social chair after that sweet, Olympic themed mixer with ADPi that saw an unseasonable amount of snow for October. That quote comes from this weeks man icon, Bode Miller. Aside from sharing a name with Swayze’s best character, Bode Miller is the most prolific American alpine skier of all time. He was the overall World Cup Champion in 2005, won 2 silver medals in the Salt Lake Olympics in 2002, became only the 5th man ever to win events in all 5 disciplines (slalom, giant slalom, combined, super-G, and downhill) in 2004, and is a 4-time World Champion in 4/5 disciplines.

What most people don’t know about Bode is that his parents are hippies. Yeah, hippies. He was born in Easton, New Hampshire and grew up in nearby Franconia on 450 acres in a log cabin with no electricity or indoor plumbing. This fucking kid had to walk to an outhouse to take a dump through 6 feet of snow when he was only 3 feet tall. To solidify his parents as raging hippies it may be interesting to our readers that his younger sister’s full name is Genesis Wren Bungo Windrushing Turtleheart, they celebrated the solstices, and Bode was home-schooled until the third grade. When his parents divorced Bode attended public school in NH, and then applied and was accepted to a ski academy in Maine and the rest is history.

Most people are familiar with Bode’s persona, his hard-living, unapologetic pursuit of perfection. Reporters have torn him up, ripped his credibility to the ground, calling him a waste of talent and someone who is more interested in having fun than competing. That is not who Bode Miller is. True he does like to party, but his recent Bronze Medal in Vancouver shows that he also trains as hard or even harder than he parties. He once described coming out of an alcohol induced blackout mid-way through a downhill race. WHAT?! You know how fucking hard core you have to be to pull that shit off? Sure he has had trouble with authority, he quit the US Ski team in 2007 and formed Team America (Fuck Yeah) in order to train and race the way he wanted, but in recent years he has become a father and has settled back into being the best skier that he can be (also rejoined Team USA). One thing is for sure, we are lucky to have him on our side. Bode, we here at WBPT wish you the best on your final 4 races in Vancouver. We will toast many a shot-ski to your successes and failures. We envy your ability to live on the edge of out-of-control and perfect speed. America, fuck yeah indeed.

“My actions are not always consistent. I’m super-mellow and laid back, but I’m always thinking and running 100,000 scenarios through my head. Sometimes I’m disciplined, but I like to be a total slacker, too. I party hard, but I train hard. People are going to try and figure me out and figure out my motivations, and it’s going to be a circus.” – Bode Miller

Neil McFadden

Music MANday….AMERICA EDITION

FUCK. REALITY. YES. BEER AND TITS.

FUCK. APPLEBEES. YES. NASCAR

FUCK. FOOTBALL’S OVER. YES. MARCH MADNESS

FUCK. NO MORE TROPICAL CLIMATE. YES. FUCK WAIT, NO MORE TROPICAL CLIMATE.

FUCK. NO MORE:

YES. WANT MORE.

Yes plebs, I am officially back in the good ole, US of A. My true mother country, and the best place on planet earth. I will miss Colombia’s unmatched natural beauty, its outstanding (and underrated) cuisine, its supple-assed, tanned stunners, and its more laid-back lifestyle, but I cannot be more excited about being back. I mean where else can you down update your blog via wi-fi, check out fine high school jailbait, overhear annoying Yankees talk about how great their round of golf was, check out jailbait again, think about punching that crying baby, nah McKenzie and her UCA camp-mates might not like that, eye-fuck the shit out of the chick sitting next to the dude in the Affliction tee, get bitched out by a fat ass security guard that probably doesn’t speak English, all the while sucking down a 96 oz. Dr. Pepper? Wait…What’s that you say? I’m in Orlando? Florida? 4 hour layover? Homeland Security? Did you say Florida?

Shit.

Yes, airports . The bane of my existence. As I sit here and write, I think simple thoughts, those of common men I rarely associate with.  I wonder if the quasi-Dominican Homeland Security drone really did enjoy cupping my balls and sniffing my taint for plastic explosives, or if that smug pedophile smile was just a courtesy “fuck you very much” he gives to every unsuspecting traveler? Either way, since I am stuck here at fateful gate 112 for the next couple of hours, I might as well wallow in misery with you plebs, my loyal companions.

Today’s (and as usual, late) edition of Music MANdays, is my first blog post stateside. And I will accompany this epic genre-busting event with the most American playlist humanly possible. Most of these songs need no explanations if you bleed like I bleed: RED. WHITE. AND SEX.

1. Born in the U.S.A by Bruce Springsteen. Oh come on now.
2. This.
3. New York, New York by Frank Sinatra. Michael Buble = UNAMERICAN.
4. This Must be the Place (Naïve Melody) by the Talking Heads.Well, not O-town, but you get the idea.
5. America by Neil Diamond. YEP.
6. New York State of Mind by NAS. I don’t sleep, cuz sleep is the cousin of death. Oh yeah, and NAS…hip hop is not dead. Unless it’s on the radio. Oh.

And now…the MAN.

This week’s MAN is none other than Jesse “The Body” Ventura.

“Bunch of slack-jawed faggots around here. This stuff (chewing tobacco) will make you a god damned sexual Tyrannosaurus, just like me.” (From Predator)

The Body has to be the manliest man we’ve profiled to date. First let’s take a look at his ultra-manly CV:

Describes himself as a Slovak. (Fuckin’ right he does)

Killed Charlies in Vietnam

After the war, served with the Navy’s Underwater Demolition Team, now the Navy SEALs

Member of the the Mongols Motorcyle Gang in San Diego back in 73, a known criminal syndicate at the time

Pro Wrestler

Pro Badass “Blain” in Predator

Fuckin’ Governor of Minnesota (SUPPORTS LEGALIZED PROSTITUTION)

So that’s quite promising. And fucking manlier than shit. You can joke about The Body all you want, call him a hypocrite, racist, but when it comes down to it, he is about as American as it gets. Of course, unless you ask him about religion. “Organized religion is a sham and a crutch for weak-minded people who need strength in numbers. It tells people to go out and stick their noses in other people’s business.” You may not agree with this quote, but you can’t argue with him. OR YOU DIE BY MINI GUN. (Fun fact: this quotation comes from his bestselling book, I Ain’t Got Time to Bleed. Hell Yeah.)

Jesse, we here at WBPT salute you good sir. Whether it’s your xenophobic tendencies, massive biceps, drug-addled upbringing, or shorn dome, you have always been, and always will be, an inspiration for all Americans. We would gladly fly off the turnbuckle with you.

Ὀδυσσεύς Bombay

Music MANday

Another week, another late Music MANday for all you loyal minions.  With OB coming off his hiatus packed full of post ideas, your boy Neil here has sat idly by and watched with awe and sheer admiration as OB scribbled masterpieces (Late Night Leatherbounds was my favorite) with drink in hand and a healthy disrespect for the status quo (what?). However, all is not lost. I did accomplish a life-long goal last week by wearing sweatpants for 3 straight days without changing. I would like to first thank the weather that covered the area in a constant drizzle, also I would like to thank NCAA football 2010 and my 4 straight number 1 recruiting classes/National Championships for helping me stay focused. I would also like to recognize Chocolate Cheerios as I couldn’t have tackled such a lofty goal without such tasty sustenance.

With the distractions of real-life National Signing Day tomorrow this will be a quick review of a new album from a New York group who describes their sound as Upper West Side Soweto. The man this week is a multi-sport and reality show icon, and he also happens to be a childhood hero of mine. Buckle your seatbelts children. Oh and if you have a pair of sweats now maybe the time to throw them on.

Vampire Weekend exploded on the scene in late 2007/early 2008 when bloggers such as myself and OB kept pumping them as a band everyone should be listening to. Rolling Stone put their tune “Cape Cod Kwassa Kwassa” on their best 100 songs of 2007 list and deemed them the “quintessential college band”, whatever the fuck that means. In January 2008 Spin magazine actually put Vampire Weekend on the cover of the mag and proclaimed them the year’s best new band, before the band had even released their debut self-titled album.

The question now is, who is this chick?

The sophomore effort “Contra” from the Columbia Alums was released on January 11 and overall it fails to meet the bar that these 4 guys have set for themselves with their 1st release. That is not necessarily a knock on this album at all, the first album was so epic and had so many good, fresh cuts that it would be hard for anybody to match it in just a year’s time. They do stay true to themselves and their music, the overall tone of the album is like something you would like to listen to with a few close friends on the deck of a house by the water in the summer time. It is relatively upbeat and utilizes a vast arsenal of instruments, especially percussion.  The album lacks the overall diversifying themes that made their 1st release so successful, they seemed to stretch their limits on that album and they take a much safer approach to making music on “Contra”. My favorite tracks are “Horchata” which is the most like “Cape Cod” and “Oxford Comma” from their 1st release (two of my favorite tracks), “Cousins” a quick and raucous tune that utilizes lots of primitive instruments before ending in a catchy refrain, and “Diplomat’s Son” a song that starts like something you would here from an album of remixes and lyrically is the album’s best work. Overall I would say this isn’t an album you should rush out and get immediately, maybe just try and get all the songs off Limewire or something. Definitely worth a listen if you got a minute.

My God a freshman indeed. That is 18 year old super-athlete Herschel Walker and he is this week’s Man Icon.

Get a good look ladies

I can’t even begin to describe how much this particular athlete means to me, it’s a completely different series of posts. Let’s just say my dad’s first gift to his newborn son was an autographed picture of Walker, and that my parents got engaged a little over an hour after he rushed 37 times for 238 yards against Florida in 1980 on his way to a record setting freshman year. After he rushed for 265 yards against Ole Miss in 1981 a reporter asked him how he could possibly carry the ball for so many yards, his answer? “It wasn’t that heavy.”  I could gush on and on about this man’s accomplishments on the gridiron but it is his triumphs in his off the field endeavors that have this hero still in the spotlight 28 years after he won the Heisman Trophy.

Herschel was always a freak athlete, he was an Olympic-quality sprinter in college and was so fast that he had two racing horses named after him. The most amazing thing about this guy is that he has never used weights to work out. He solely relies on his own body to work out, doing thousands of push-ups, sit-ups, and pull-ups every day to stay in shape. He is also a bit of an enigma in that he has a bi-polar type condition that borders on disassociative identity disorder.

Chickin wang

All the while Herschel has been a leader of men, investing in various business ventures after his days in the NFL came to an end. He has put money in everything from a logistics company, to a soda named Hallelujah Cola, to a few choice fried chicken franchises. Herschel came from a large family of 7 children in Wrightsville, GA and has not only supported his parents but has given back to his High School and the community as a whole. He was a reality show TV star on one of the Celebrity Apprentice series’  and went toe-to-toe with Dennis Rodman and told him to his face that “You are a bad person” which I like to believe led to Rodman checking himself into a new reality show, Celebrity Rehab.

This is all well and good, but what separates Herschel Walker from every other freak athlete/Heisman Winner/NFL stud/Reality Star/Fried Chicken connoisseur? Maybe the fact that he is a certified black belt and now, at age 47 he is a professional Mixed Martial Artist. Yeah he’s a pro MMA fighter and recently beat a tested middle weight fighter 21 years his junior by Technical Knock Out in the 3rd Round of his first ever fight. I’ll let the below video speak for itself. I could go on and on on this guy. But it’s getting late and OB will be pissed if I don’t finish this pretty soon. So Herschel we here at WBPT salute you sir, your physical prowess as the perfect human specimen will always be acknowledged on this site and hopefully many others.

Neil McFadden

Music MANday

How about it everybody? Are all you bandwagon fans soooo happy the Saints made it to the Super Bowl?!?! I hope so. Because you won’t be that happy once The Quarterback Formerly Known as Peyton Manning rips through your collective faux-cajun (see what I did there?) stomachs like a frozen Hand Grenade and an undercooked batch of Crawfish. Neil and I agree…Colts win, and likely cover. You heard it hear first. Anyway, I hope yall have had as eventful of a Monday as I have. I spent the first half of the day in my new Brooks Brothers robe, and the latter eating pizza, watching movies, and wishing I had a double percolated Roor in my lap. Now I write.

All of tonight’s songs have links, check them out.

Venus /Air - Great chill out jam. I was listening to it earlier today and it inspired a 2 hour nap. Is this good or bad?

Bigs/STS9 – This is a great cut from their 2007 Bonnaroo show, which is epic and you should download immediately. Love STS9 and their shows are always some of the best times, even if you do have to be a designated driver (thanks guys).

Starálfur / Sigur Rós – One of my favorites from the boys from Reykjavik, you may have heard it during the submarine scene at the end of The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou or at my house sophomore year in college during late night study sessions.  If you haven’t listened to much Sigur Rós I recommend them highly, and if you want to watch a badass music documentary check out Heima (Click for full movie).

Alpha Beta Parking Lot / Cake – What the hell happened to Cake? Wait, don’t answer that. Either way, they were fun while they lasted, and this song is just that, fun. Kinda makes me wanna drink Natty Light.

99 Red Balloons / Nena – Thank you JJ for the amazing 80’s collection you gave me. This English version of the classic German song reminds me of playing Gran Turismo 3 for hours on end.

Something About Us / Daft Punk – Daft Punk has a love song? Yes, haters, they do. And it works to get your girl in the mood (trust me on this one), so it does two big things for me: 1) Rocks 2) Gets the panties a-droppin’. So yeah, I like it. It was part of their animated movie Interstella 5555 (click for full movie).

And the MAN?

 

Ayrton Senna, legendary Formula One driver, and mystical hero to the entire country of Brazil who lost his life at the San Marino Gran Prix in 1994. OK, if you don’t know much about F1, then pay attention here, as this guy was the fiercest competitor to ever get behind the wheel of an open wheel car. I don’t care if Michael Schumacher holds all the records imaginable in F1, Senna was the most talented driver ever, and unstoppable in the rain. In 2009 a poll of 217 former F1 drivers voted Senna the best ever. You have to appreciate a guy who lived his life at over 200 mph and never backed down to anyone. During his shortened career, he won 3 world championships, 41 out of 161 races, with a staggering 65 pole positions. He is most famous for his aggressive driving style, sheer insanity at the most precarious of moments on the track, and his bitter rivalry with former teammate and F1 legend, Alain Prost. The two were teammates at McLaren for two years, and their rivalry continued when Prost moved to Ferrari in 1990. Senna clearly wrecked Prost on purpose in the 1990 Japanese Grand Prix to secure his third and final championship, openly admitting it later by saying “So I said to myself, ‘OK, whatever happens, I’m going to get into the first corner first — I’m not prepared to let the guy (Alain Prost) turn into that corner before me. If I’m near enough to him, he can’t turn in front of me — he just has to let me through.’ I didn’t care if we crashed; I went for it. And he took a chance, turned in, and we crashed. It was building up, it was inevitable. It had to happen.” The four time champion Prost was once quoted as saying Senna “Cares more about winning than living.”

Easily the ballsiest driver ever, this dude provided the world with many memorable quotes that truly described his racing style and general outlook on life.

“And suddenly I realized that I was no longer driving the car consciously. I was driving it by a kind of instinct, only I was in a different dimension. ”(This was after qualifying a full second faster than anyone at the 1988 Monaco GP, he later admitted to being scared of how fast he was)

“I continuously go further and further learning about my own limitations, my body limitation, psychological limitations. It’s a way of life for me.”

“I want to live fully, very intensely. I would never want to live partially, suffering from illness or injury. If I ever happen to have an accident that eventually costs my life, I hope it happens in one instant.”

“Women – always in trouble with them, but can’t live without them.”

Senna was the ultimate competitor, and eloquent to boot. He didn’t care about what the press said, and was always frank and controversial with them, not like the boring political correctness we have to endure with today’s athletes. His tragic death at Imola in 1994 at the Tamburello corner was truly haunting and is still shrouded with mystery. That same race weekend, Austrian Roland Ratzenberger died in a terrifying wreck, and fellow Brazilian Rubens Barrichello was involved in another serious accident. The weekend changed F1 forever, as helmet technology and car safety standards were dramatically improved. There has not been a death in an F1 car since.

He was a man of character as well. After his death it was revealed that he had donated over $80 million to charities in Brazil, something he never made public during his career. Also, quite hauntingly, when the safety crews inspected his car after his fatal crash, they found an Austrian flag in the cockpit, Senna had planned on waving it from his car after crossing the finish line in honor of Ratzenberger.

I now leave you with some of his most memorable moments. And if you don’t like F1, blow me.

Check out this amazing video of Senna qualifying for the 1991 Monaco GP, full of glorious Honda V12 engine revs and manual shifting.

A tribute to Senna, music kinda sucks though:

And this gem from Jerez:

Ὀδυσσεύς Bombay

Be Cool My Babies…

Dear Internet,

The first words out of his mouth were “No really, we don’t have a lot of time…” The crowd was emotional and outrageous, as was deserved and expected. Multiple standing ovations took minutes to silence and cast and crew were damn close to tears. When questioning the first skit Conan jested, “We didn’t rehearse because we don’t care…and we’ve been drinking.” Max Weinberg blasted his drums, La Bamba crushed his trombone, and Andy was even more hilarious than he was back in the early days.

After a Giant Sloth skeleton sprayed a Picasso with beluga caviar in the opening bit in an attempt to spend as much NBC cash as possible, Conan had to undergo an exit interview by an NBC employee. Steve Carell walked out and promptly asked Conan a number of questions including “Would you describe your time at NBC as Positive, Very Positive, or Extremely Positive?” and “Would you ever consider working for NBC again?” Carell’s quick and pointed awkward hilarity summed up the entire evening, as Conan and crew tried to make the best of their short-live Late Night fame.

Tom Hanks came out as the first guest from under the curtain hoisting two scotches and sporting some serious shades. He handed one to CoCo (the term Hanks coined for Conan) and referred to the drink as “daddy’s little reward”. Hanks echoed my own sentiments when he said, “In my house you will always be host of The Tonight Show.” Hanks and O’Brien then reminisced about the late ’80s SNL days when Hanks was hosting and Conan was writing until Conan finally turned the conversation to Hanks and his upcoming efforts. Both the consummate professionals, this exchange was the closest the show would come to a normal talk show.

Neil Young was next up to show his support for Conan, looking aged and pointing back at Conan as he began. Neil launched into his very fitting tune “Long May You Run” from his album of the same name. When he was finished Young praised Conan for his talented ear screaming “Thank you for everything you’ve done for new music!” If you’re anything like me, you used to stay up late just to hear that “new band” on Conan that was on the rise. His show has exposed acts like Radiohead, Kings of Leon, Drive-by Truckers and Green Day to the national stage in his earlier days on Late Night with Conan O’Brien.

Conan then explained in sincerity that he could say anything he wanted and proceeded to thank NBC for being his professional home for over 20 years. He stuck to his guns and fought back tears, saying it’s every comedian’s dream to host The Tonight Show and that he lived that dream for 7 months. He then thanked his fans, stumbling mightily with the tears, and begged the young people to not be cynical, to be kind and surely amazing things will happen.

That was as serious as Conan would allow. Enter Will Ferrell dressed as Ronnie Van Zant of Lynyrd Skynyrd, Neil Young t-shirt and all, leading Max Weinberg on drums, one member of ZZ Top (the one with the beard…), Beck, Ben Harper, as well as Conan all playing guitar in an amazing version of Freebird. During the jam session Ferrell balled out on his cowbell and Conan shredded until the credits rolled.

Those of you who think I’m being over dramatic and too serious are probably right. But Conan O’Brien was just as big a part of my upbringing as the Ninja Turtles, Goldeneye (the game), David’s Sunflower Seeds, Victoria Secret Catalogs, Natty Lite, and ElastoMania combined. I attribute most of the humorous tendencies of this website to him and his writing and I’m sure OB would echo this sentiment. Late Night was a staple at sleep-overs and was the first thing I turned on when I got home right after curfew. His acts of Triumph the Insult Comic Dog, The Masturbating Bear, and the Year 2000(3000) constantly had me in stitches. If nothing else, his giant ginger physique and sharp tongue will be missed the most.

Conan himself said that life is too short to be cynical so I won’t write my planned words for NBC and Jay Leno here. I will only wish Conan and his family the best, maybe a move back to New York and a new gig on Fox or FX back in his old 12:30 slot would do the trick. Possibly when Leno is ready to retire for real, then NBC will swallow it’s pride and give Conan back the spot that he has earned. Until that time myself and a myriad of other 20-35 year olds will be anxiously awaiting the return of our generation’s de facto late night talk show host.

Neil McFadden

Music MANday

Back from the hiatus, I apologize for the lack of Posts these last few days, I have been out of town and OB is pleasure cruising with Abigail around his sub-equatorial paradise. The Music MANday is a special Friday edition and I did manage to get a guest writer to give me something earlier this week, he is a college buddy of mine and his piece on Avatar is damn good, see below. Look for more of Atticus Noisewater’s contributions in the coming days, and hopefully longer than that if we can keep him around. This week’s Music MANday is a clusterfuck of new school and old school, as both the band centered on and the man idolized are involved in bringing together these two conflicting um, well “schools” I guess. Read on.

Being a UGA Alum you will be forced from time to time to listen to my complete ramblings on the Athens area’s best and brightest prospects, musically and otherwise. This is one of those times.

The Futurebirds are an up and coming act out of Athens that has drawn some serious attention. Described as an “an alt-country / southern rock / mountain / experimental / other music type six-some” their live shows are chocked full of energy and genuine ardor for the music they play. Musically I would describe them as a unholy combination of Widespread Panic, Fleet Foxes, and The Whigs. Then add a heavy dose of pedal steel and a serious chip on their shoulder and you may have scratched the surface. These guys and girl have some serious potential to make major moves, especially considering they are an unsigned act relatively unknown outside of Georgia. They are attempting to meld the musical attributes of two totally different regions, the Northwest (Portland, Seattle, etc.) and the Dirty South. If they continue to grow from their release Futurebirds EP (download for free here) I see no end in sight for this group. One thing is for sure, it’s gonna be fun to watch.

The Futurebirds

Mixed Martial Arts. Something dudes like you and me talk about over lunch at the deli and watch on Friday nights in a haze of local brews and the finest cheeb. The gist of it being that these motherfuckers can fight, no barriers or styles constrain them, they can flat out brawl. Quinton Jackson is no exception. Jackson earned his chops in Japan’s Pride Fighting Championships as a 23 year old man-child. On the side Jackson dabbled in K-1 kickboxing and knocked out Cyril Abidi 1:55 in the first round in 2002. He then went on to defeat Chuck Liddell in Pride Final Conflict 2003 by corner stoppage.  This would serve as a precursor to UFC 71 when the new Quinton “Rampage” Jackson knocked UFC Light Heavyweight Champion Liddell to the mat and then pummeled him mercilessly until Chucky handed over the belt and his dignity, 1:53 into the first fucking round.

Is that a jaguar tatoo? Fuck yeah it's a jaguar tatoo

This essentially cements Rampage’s status as a bad mamma jamma and would be more than enough to feature him on any blog as a beacon of Manliness. But this isn’t any blog, this is WBPT  and one must go the extra fucking mile to have me sit down and develop a serious man-crush via my keyboard. Yeah he’s a badass, yeah he can literally kick 98% of the people in the world’s ass on any given day. But what separates him from the rest? I’ll tell you. Who the fuck else has the strength to knock the fuck outta Chuck Liddell and then turn around and exhibit the acting chops necessary to portray B.A. Baracus of the A-Team? That’s right lowly serfs, Rampage is the new Mr. T… In June, 2010 he will star alongside Bradley “The Sack Man” Cooper and Liam “Ra’s-Al-Ghul” Neeson in the movie remake of the The A-Team. For what it’s worth I can’t wait for this flick to come out, I sincerely hope they relegate Rampage to more than just a few one-liners and quips about kicking tail. If he can hold his own in this film, look out Hollywood and world as Rampage is on the loose and the sky’s the limit. No, Rampage will fuck the sky up and hang out in the outer reaches of the Atmosphere. Rampage has it all, a legitimate Ultimate Fighting Pedigree, an acting career on the rise, and even a serious criminal record (felony reckless driving, felony hit and run, felony evading police all acquired after he lost a match to Forrest Griffin, didn’t sleep or eat for 4 days and was so pumped up on energy drinks he decided to play monster truck in his jacked-up F-350 with his picture on the side while driving down the wrong side of the street/sidewalk). All necessary prerequisites for being Man of the week. Rampage we here at WBPT will continue to sip drinks and admire your work from afar, too scared to be within 40 cubits of your shadowy, well chiseled features.

Neil McFadden

random

Looks like UGA has swung and missed on Kirby Smart, getting yet another top Defensive Coordinator a hefty raise. But hey cheer up Dawg fans, at least Richt is good for the economy:

http://blogs.ajc.com/mark-bradley-blog/2010/01/12/richts-stimulus-package-say-no-to-uga-and-get-rich/?cxntfid=blogs_mark_bradley_blog

Neil McFadden

music manday

With the bowl season winding down I’m forced back into my normal routine of waking up at the crack of 11, walking the dog, taking a shower, scouring job-search sites and sending out seemingly meaningless resumes and cover-letters until I give up and revert to the 3 things I’m really good at. The first is reading UGA message boards and this has gotten completely monotonous as the DC search continues (2 words – Todd Grantham, hope the Cowboys lose this week) as everyone thinks they have a better source than the other guy and that their opinion matters more. The second is wasting time by finding new and enlightening musical compositions. The third is watching reruns of TV shows I’ve seen at least twice before, I still laugh…and cry. The latest installment of Music MANday will show off these talents so here we go.

This week I’m taking a page out of OB’s book and just listing some tunes from my most recent Ipod playlist:

That Western Skyline / Dawes – The LA group succeeds in sounding very un-Californian in their freshman effort North Hills. It takes me back to a cross-country journey, driving through the southern Utah desert at dawn.

Sweet Disposition / The Temper Trap – A percussion heavy jam that gets the blood pumping. The Temper Trap is like an Australian version of My Morning Jacket, except you can understand the lyrics.

The Thrill / Wiz Khalifa - The Pittsburgh-based rapper lays a tight flow (yeah I said it) over Empire of the Sun’s track “Walking On A Dream” off their album of the same name. This remix is pretty hard to find, so here it is on youtube (click here).

Lua / Bright Eyes – Voted one of Rolling Stone’s Top 100 tracks of the 00′s this song is like a musical short story. Mostly about starving artists and their vices, it doesn’t make me sympathetic as much as envious of their lifestyle.

If I Ever Feel Better / Phoenix – Straight funk from one of my new favorite bands. This track was released off their 2000 debut album United. Their 2009 Wolfgang Amadeus Phoenix may be my favorite album of this past year.

The Death of Us / The New Amsterdams – I’m a sucker for a late night driving song and this is a good one. Anything that takes my mind back to a drive home to beat curfew and a freshly sparked Camel Light will always be on my playlists.

And now… the MAN

A star is only as good as his sidekick. This man belongs in the same elite category that holds Robin, Ed McMahon and Barney Fife as some of their esteemed members. He made everyday household upkeep seem beneath him and the most advanced, technical carpentry and plumbing concepts his bitch. He brought back the beard, flannel, and being a momma’s boy. Women want him, men want to be him. That’s right bitches the MAN of the week is Al Borland.

Hey girl, hows about you drop them britches?

Al was always the brains behind Tool Time, he did a stint in the Navy as a young Borland, and we’re all pretty sure he was getting a piece of Heidi on the side. Al’s father was 60 when he was born, so we know Al came from hardened, old-man semen making him strong and callous straight from the womb, this also accounts for his vast knowledge of all things tools and construction related. He has a gut so we can presume he pounds beers at a local watering hole that he either owns or at least regulars. He was named Detroit’s most eligible bachelor and that was all she wrote (literally, after she wrote it she commenced to fuck Al Borland for the rest of her life), he kept dating super-foxy Orthodontist Ilene just for appearances as he was banging every split-tail that crossed his path. The man made his own fucking board game! How many motherfuckers do you know that have the knowledge and the steady hand to pull that shit off? I know one, and his mother’s name is Alma Borland.

Let this be a WBPT salute to you Al Borland, may your flannel be ironed, your jeans pressed, your toolbelt cinched, and your women warm and willing.

Music MANday

New Year’s is upon us, and we here at WBPT want to wish you all the best, as well as encourage you do your best to drink as much Jager and Champagne as possible, make a fool of yourself, and make out with the drunkest and/or ugliest girl at the party. This year, whether you’re Auld Lang Syning about town with your friends, blowing chop off that girl you met at your buddy’s lake house that one weekend, or crying to your ex about how much you love her, take a second to reflect on the year that has come and gone so goshdarn fast. It’s been a mostly shitty year for most of the world. Natural disasters, war, a shitty economy, the Twilight series, and the goddamn Yankees have all had the proverbial upper hand as tragedy and frustration defined 2009. Of course, there were some good things mixed in too. First black man inaugurated as POTUS (crosses fingers), OutKast and the Beastie Boys announce new albums for the near future, The Beatles get re-mastered, Erin Andrews nudie video, Tiger Woods’ public demise, the US National Team shows up in a big way at the FIFA Confederations Cup, and oh yeah, MOTHAFUCKIN’ BAMA FOOTBALL. So here’s to you 2010, because you probably won’t suck as much as 09 did.

This week’s Music MANday is a day late, and I apologize. But with my parents in Bogota and a busy day at work, time just runs the fuck out. Once again, this week I bring you a quick shuffle playlist from my iPod:

Chest Fever / The Band – Great tune here. Makes me think of all those nights the Last Waltz Band played at the Phi Gam house, such great memories with great friends. Roll Tide.

Careful / Hot Chip – A Short little jam with some funky, up-beat percussion mixed with some smooth synthesizer, and choppy lyrics with a spacey chorus. Good stuff, but not exactly what I wanted to hear at the moment.

Elevators (Locsmif Mix) / OutKast – Jazzy slowed down version of an OutKast classic. The whole remix album by Floyd the Locsmif out of ATL is amazing, and my favorite of all the OutKast mixtapes I have heard. Make sure you get it.

So What´cha Want (Soul Assassins Remix) / Beastie Boys – Probably the most famous of all the Beastie Boys remixes, and for good reason. This version, with a Cyprus Hill cameo, is off the re-mastered Check Your Head release. Sounds great through my new Shure SE115’s.

Killing In The Name / Rage Against The Machine – I just punched someone, and it felt good goddamnit. Great song for planning a G8 meeting protest.

Spanish Armada / Ratatat – One of the many incredible songs this band has put out over the years, this one from their 2004 self-titled effort.  This band, in my opinion, can convey sentiment, emotion and environment incredibly, and have been probably my favorite band of 2009. Oh yeah, sick French horn jam in this song as well.

And now….the MAN.

Wild Thing you make our hearts sing

That’s right you bastards, Charlie Sheen. Besides being the greatest actor of our generation, this guy has lived the ultimate Hollywood life. He has banged the hottest women in the United States year in and year out, and still has a huge hooker problem. He is on a primetime family sitcom, and still blows coke like it was 1982. Once, during an epic binge session, The Wild Thing and producer Don Simpson (whom himself was a huge coke and hooker addict before his death) got into a huge fight over a gun Simpson had borrowed from Sheen’s massive weapons collection, causing Sheen to shoot holes in the walls of Simpson’s Hollywood mansion in front of a gaggle of prostitutes. If this isn’t the stuff of legends, I don’t know what is.

Sheen was arrested on Christmas morning this year, charged with domestic abuse, and from what his wife is telling police, for threatening her with a knife. Ok, not cool Charlie. But since you were in Wall Street, I will forgive you. Wait you’ve been arrested how many times? No worries mang, you kicked ass in Platoon. Hold on a sec, you actually shot your fiancée Kelly Preston in the arm back in 1990? Ha, I really don’t care, you dated multiple porn stars and got to hit this on the reg:

Bottom line is this: Charlie Sheen is a dumbass who has been in some seriously awesome movies. Young Guns, Hot Shots 1 and Part Deux, Major League 1 and 2, Ferris Bueller’s Day Off, Platoon, Wall Street, Navy SEALs, etc. etc. Sure he hasn’t made a decent movie in over a decade, but who cares? His brother is Emilio Estevez! He has epitomized the lack of coherence and utter disregard for well-being that Hollywood and its absurd outgrowths have perpetuated throughout our fame-obsessed quasi-culture during the last 25 or so years. He has fucked up so many times, and we still love him, a walking metaphor for our forgiving and often hypocritical society. Tip of my three corner hat to you Charlie Sheen, you have constantly bounced back, always with a sexy broad in tow. Here’s to hoping this isn’t your last hurrah.

Ὀδυσσεύς Bombay